Author: Doody Free Girl
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The Braxton Shits
With my 11/29 due date approaching, I was convinced that I was in labor Saturday morning. I woke up around 4am with fleeting abdominal cramps, so I started timing my contractions, which were about 30 minutes apart. From all of my research and confirmation from my doula, I understand that there’s no need to rush…
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Butt Implants
The colon is responsible for absorbing liquid from the waste it is processing, essentially baking your shit into a solid Yule log. So by that very same token, your colon readily absorbs some of the water that is used to flush the colon during a colonic. And using that logic, I’ve decided to start administering…
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Vitamin See
About eight years ago, one of my most thoughtful clients gave me a book called The Program for Better Vision, How to See Better in Minutes a Day without Glasses or Contacts! by Martin Sussman. At the time, I was about 30 years old, which made it the most appropriate gift since she had corrected…
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No Sleep Til’…This Shit is Over?
This quarantine has proven a stressful time for everyone. A record number of people have filed for unemployment, parents are now forced to homeschool their kids (God bless…), and the number of those diagnosed with the Corona Virus is steadily increasing along with the number of deaths. Needless to say, many people are losing sleep…
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Just What The Doctor Ordered…
Dr. Leo Galland shares a complete Corona Virus protocol on his website. Dr. Galland kindly spells out for us how the COVID-19 is actually a 2 phase illness, where 80% of people who contract the disease only suffer from mild symptoms during Phase 1 (fatigue, aches, pains, sore throat) for about five days (not needing…
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Corona Virus
While everyone is busy stockpiling toilet paper, my ass is more concerned with stockpiling beneficial bacteria in my system to deal with the threat of COVID-19. If I run out of TP, I will rely on a good ole’ shower or squirt bottle to clean my ass. What’s most important is that we keep our…
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For Shit Sake
Nothing really gets me going like grown adults shitting their pants. Luckily, my clients feel comfortable sharing their juicy stories with me and lucky for you, they don’t mind me sharing them. One day, I will compile them all into a neatly sized bathroom book, For Shit Sake, because everyone can use a little motivation…
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Great Minds Shit Alike.
I had the honor of talking shit with one of my health and colonic mentors, Mike Perrine, on his EveryDayDetox podcast. Mike is the owner of Vitality NYC, where I work on the first Tuesday of every month. You can book me for a colonic in NYC on the Vitality NYC website. Hope you enjoy…
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Fashion for your Bloated Ass
My best friend and fashion idol is one of the head buyers at Bergdorf Goodman, what I believe is the highest grossing department store in Manhattan because everything they sell is expensive as shit. My friend is rather private and OCD (I should know, we were college roommates), so let’s just call her Anal. Anal…
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Back To Basics
I’m a sucker for scents…I’m always diffusing lemongrass essential oil at the studio and patchouli EO at home. I spray Poopourri in the toilet before I shit. I burn Palo Santo after my cat shits. I want to smell every natural perfume available to woman. I love discovering new scents to inject into my coconut…