Category: Girl Code
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Crapping Your Bed is the Coolest.
Good news, ladies! You are given free rein to poop yourself when in labor. You can even piss yourself if you feel like it. I highly recommend you take full advantage of this opportunity as it’s the only socially acceptable time to poop and pee all over your bed once you’ve made it past adolescense. A pregnant client of…
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Girls are Dirty.
In an earlier post demanding that guys take better care of their toilets, I failed to mention how despicably filthy women can be when using public toilets. Ironically, men’s public bathrooms are notoriously cleaner than women’s. I’m sick of walking into a public bathroom and slowly checking out the stalls through my periphery in fear of having my heart jump at…
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Enemas are a Pregnant Lady’s BFF.
If a woman is eating for two, shouldn’t she be pooping for two?? I’ve never been pregnant, but everyone knows pregnant women don’t poop. I’ve been asking all my pregnant clients for some tips & tricks to share with the rest of the knocked up population. It seems like everyone has a different opinion with regards to…
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Doody Free Girls Don’t Gossip.
A conversation with a client last night shed some more light on why girls are so afraid to go #2 in public. I’ve become so jaded from my work that I easily forget how traumatizing it is for girls to poop in public even around their female peers. My client, a grown woman, is still terrified to poop in the multi-stall women’s bathroom at work…
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Let’s Talk About Poop!
Why has bowel failure struck mostly women today? It’s quite evident that females have unjustly suffered from a double poop standard. I personally remember being terrified to poop anywhere but home and my girlfriends would concur. Many of my female clients come in routinely for colonics because their bowels have completely shut down from years…