TALES OF A COLON HYDROTHERAPIST
Irrigating bowels since 2009 as a colon hydrotherapist has given me a lot of insight into people’s bathroom woes. In honor of my clients, I created my Doody Free Girl blog in 2012 in an effort to erase the stigma surrounding women and their basic human right to take a dump. I am constantly learning from my clients about the daily physical and emotional struggles involved in accomplishing this critical bodily function. Obstacles include anything from extra loopy intestines to office stage fright. Doody Free Girl serves as both a physical and a virtual refuge for those suffering from either physical or emotional constipation because ultimately, constipation can become a source of depression, anxiety and illness.
I received my Colon Hydrotherapist Certification from the Wood Hygienic Institute in Kissimmee, FL in 2009 from the one and only Helen Wood. In 2010, I received my Certified Nutritionist Consultant (CNC) and Holistic Counselor Certifications studying with holistic carnivore, Dian Freeman of Wellness Simplified in 2010. In 2009, I studied intensely with master detox chef, Doris Choi to learn how to create artisanal, yet healthy dishes with ease. I have also trained extensively with the likes of New York City’s finest raw vegans; Tommy “Detox” DeVito, Gil Jacobs and Natalia Rose as early as 2008. I worked full time as senior therapist at Release NYC from 2011 until 2016. In short, I have studied and worked with the best and have embraced all of the extremes, bringing me to some universal conclusions I think everyone could benefit from.
So let’s cut the crap. I believe the gateway to optimal health and vibrancy is through proper care of our digestive tracts. We must clear out the garbage in a timely fashion so that our bodies remain free from toxic overload, allowing for only the absorption of essential nutrients from our food. Our digestive tracts can then provide proper nourishment via the bloodstream to the rest of our vital organs. Gravity colonics are the most natural and gentle, yet effective way to clear out weeks and arguably years worth of waste. I hope to affect change through clean, happy colons because a healthy butt promotes a confidant strut!
All joking aside, I take great pride in providing the safest and cleanest environment for my clients. Comfort and trust are of utmost importance during a colonic treatment for optimal results and therefore, never taken lightly.
Disclaimer: I’m not a doctor (not even a little bit) or a prostitute, just a glorified plumber. Men are always welcome, just no perverts. Please consult with your doctor before testing my tricks. Also, I’ve been photoshopped.